I remember a time,
Not that long ago,
To be driven by misery,
by sorrow and pain.

Walking a world covered in snow,
A cold heart cracked.

Stayed up late… and every night,
The lights flickering and switching,
Faster than I could keep up,
music, louder, louder and louder still.

I can feel the bass, pumping through me,
Existence, but a mere memory,
drinking, and drinking,
till the memories fade.

Walking out into the cold,
the snow falling,
forever falling,
walking with the snow crunching,
and it felt like forever.

Dragging on yet another cigarette,
on yet another dark day,
yet another grey day,
The sun might be brightening up the day,
but it wasn’t making a dent on mine.

Wandering back into the darkness,
the noise screams at me,
People shout and I wave,
I push and trudge my way to the bar,
for yet another drink,
with yet another drunk.

I smiled, I laughed,
and inside, I didn’t cry,
for all that would make me cry,
was being forgotten,

was a lifetime away,
and yet never quite forgotten.

But in this pain,
in this misery,
in these grey days,
I lived a life.

A life fuelled by drugs and passion
a strong desire to run
far far far away.

Today, now, looking back,
music, louder, louder and louder still.

A drink in my hand,
but no cigarette to my mouth.

Pain, misery and suffering but a memory,
something I barely remember,
not forgotten. A life that was.

All it took was a beat, a song, a lyric,
and in an opening,
the memories come back,
flooding as if they were always there.

It is yet different,
They are calm,
no longer running.

And I let the music seep in
and into my existence,
enjoy my existence
as I once myself was lost
in the music, in the bass, in the beat.

What I once stumbled across,
only while running away,
I now experience,
not entirely by accident,
but by choice.

The power,
the charisma,
the love,
the passion,
the bass,
the melody,
the lyrics,
the drugs,
the passion,
the love….

life… :-)